New Days

(Obama pride over blackberry beer)

(All Saints Day in Zagreb, Croatia- poignant sad music as everyone flocks to the cemetery)

These last two weeks have been so full; I have hesitated to put my thoughts into words. I miss art- messy chalk pastels and leaky acrylic under my fingernails. However, as I feel some of my revelations slipping away as well as my intentionality, and writing and photography seem to be my creative outlets, I'll go ahead and forego the succinct "moral of the story" posts I seem inclined to, and just spew what's in my heart right now.


Like my quirky Halloween in Croatia, surrounded by Couch Surfers and 80's techno (I'm missing filthy American dancing...) election "night" was equally surreal. My sense of the urgency of needed change in U.S. foreign policy has increased exponentially since being in the Balkans. Americans are perhaps the favorite categories of comedy here: our ignorance to geography, languages, overly fake friendliness and obsession with being PC while being international bullies... Though elements of this are of course correct, I've surprised myself by the things I DO appreciate about the States, as well as my reaction to the hypocrisy and easy laughs inspired by perpetuated stereotypes. Having heard more blatant sexism, racism, and gallons on homophobia since being here, I appreciate our self-conscious guilt (until the point that its crippling not catalytic).

Even in the face of so much Obama-ptimism, there is utter disillusionment/hopelessness among Serbians towards the U.S.; more so than any other country I've visited. Perhaps its to do with the visual reminders: buildings that still gutted and decimated by our bombs. Point is, stayed up all night curled in bed watching the BBC election results pour in whileskyping with Lin in South Korea and Megan in San Fran, and while it wasn't partying in the streets w/Oprah, there was something appropriate about watching the sun rise while tears leaked down my face and Obama delivered his eloquent acceptance speech. So, I tremulously/proudly donned my Obama-t and walked to work, and the few "I love Obama!"s that I got were enough to water my hopes that some day we may actually be cautiously proud to be Americans...